Grade by Grade
C–D. Reading and Writing · Reading and Writing in French: Voices, Stories and Communities

Écrire un récit : Planning, Drafting and Revising a Story with Adverbs and Connectors

D1.1 D1.2 D1.3 D2.1 D2.2 D2.4About 75 minutes
Learning goals
  • I can plan a story with the schéma narratif (five stages).
  • I can form adverbs ending in -ment, including -amment and -emment, and know the irregular adverbs bien, mal, vite, gentiment.
  • I can place adverbs correctly in the present and the passé composé.
  • I can link my ideas with time, contrast and cause connectors.
  • I can revise a draft by adding, removing, moving and replacing words, and set a goal for my next piece of writing.

Words to know

le schéma narratif
The five-stage structure of a story: initial situation, triggering event, complications, resolution, final situation.
l'élément déclencheur
The triggering event: the moment the problem starts.
les péripéties
The complications and obstacles that build tension.
le dénouement
The resolution: how the problem is solved.
un adverbe
A word that tells how, when, where or how much an action happens (lentement, hier, ici, beaucoup).
un connecteur
A linking word that joins ideas (ensuite, pourtant, donc).
le brouillon
The rough draft.
réviser
To revise: improve the ideas, order and word choice of a draft.

From reader to writer

In the last lesson you read Le chalet du lac and saw how an author builds suspense. Now it's your turn. Real writers don't write a perfect story in one go: they plan, write a draft, then revise it, often several times.

Today you'll plan a short suspense story with the structure French students learn in school, the schéma narratif, and you'll add two style tools that make writing smoother: adverbs and connectors.

Purpose and audience first (D1.1): your story's purpose is to entertain and create tension. Your audience is Grade 9 students, so the story can be a little scary but not gory, and the vocabulary should be clear.

Le schéma narratif1. Situation initialequi ? où ? quand ?2. Élément déclencheurle problème commence3. Péripétiestension, obstacles4. Dénouementle problème est résolu5. Situation finaleet après ?
The schéma narratif: tension climbs from the triggering event to the complications, then falls after the resolution. Le chalet du lac follows this exact shape.
ÉtapeDans Le chalet du lac
1. Situation initialeSnowy February night; Zoé and Malik play cards; parents went to the village.
2. Élément déclencheurThe parents are late, then the lights go out.
3. PéripétiesA scratching noise, the flashlight, the slow walk to the door, a shadow at the window.
4. DénouementZoé opens the door: it's a raccoon!
5. Situation finaleThe cousins laugh; the parents come home.
The story from Lesson 4 mapped onto the schéma narratif.
Worked example

Let's plan a story with the schéma narratif

Plan a suspense story called Le sentier (The trail) about two friends on a snowshoe hike near their town.

  1. 1. Situation initiale (imparfait): a Saturday in January; Amir and Chloé are snowshoeing on a forest trail near Sudbury; their parents know the route and the time they will be back. The sky était gris.
  2. 2. Élément déclencheur (passé composé): fog suddenly falls and they can no longer see the trail markers.
  3. 3. Péripéties: the phone has low battery; they hear a branch crack; they find footprints, but are they their own?
  4. 4. Dénouement: Chloé remembers the advice from a guide: Arrête-toi, reste calme et cherche les marques. They find an orange marker on a tree and follow the trail back.
  5. 5. Situation finale: they arrive at the parking lot where Amir's father is waiting. Next time they will bring a charged phone and a map.

A complete five-stage plan. Notice the plan is in point form: you write full sentences later, in the draft.

Adverbs: how the action happens

Adverbs add precision and atmosphere: Il a ouvert la porte lentement. Many English adverbs end in -ly; many French adverbs end in -ment.

Forming -ment adverbs:

  1. Usually, take the feminine form and add -ment: lent → lente → lentement; doux → douce → doucement; nerveux → nerveuse → nerveusement.
  2. If the masculine ends in a vowel, add -ment to the masculine: vrai → vraiment; poli → poliment; rapide → rapidement.
  3. -ant → -amment and -ent → -emment: constant → constamment; patient → patiemment. Both endings sound the same: a-man.
  4. Irregular: bon → bien; mauvais → mal; gentil → gentiment; bref → brièvement. And vite (quickly) has no -ment at all.
Former un adverbe en -mentFéminin + -mentlent → lente → lentementheureux → heureuse → heureusementVoyelle : masculin + -mentvrai → vraimentpoli → poliment-ant → -ammentconstant → constammentbruyant → bruyamment-ent → -emmentpatient → patiemmentprudent → prudemment
Four patterns for -ment adverbs. The -amment / -emment endings are both pronounced a-man.

Where do adverbs go?

  • Present or imparfait: right after the verb: Le vent souffle fort. Elle marchait lentement.
  • Passé composé: short, common adverbs go between the helping verb and the participle: J'ai bien dormi. Elle a déjà mangé. Ils ont vite compris. Tu as beaucoup travaillé. Je n'ai jamais vu ça.
  • Longer -ment adverbs usually go after the participle: Il a ouvert la porte lentement.
  • Adverbs of time and soudain, tout à coup can open the sentence: Soudain, la neige a commencé à tomber.
JobConnectors
Order in timed'abord, ensuite, puis, après, pendant que, au moment où, soudain, tout à coup, finalement, enfin
Contrastmais, pourtant, cependant, par contre, au lieu de
Causeparce que, car, puisque, à cause de
Consequencedonc, alors, c'est pourquoi
Connectors make a story flow. Pendant que (while) is usually followed by the imparfait: Pendant qu'ils marchaient, le brouillard est tombé.
Worked example

Let's revise a flat draft

Revise this draft from Le sentier. Use the four revision moves: ajouter (add), retirer (remove), déplacer (move), remplacer (replace).

Amir et Chloé marchaient. Ils marchaient dans la forêt. Le brouillard est arrivé. Il était épais. Ils avaient peur. Ils ont cherché les marques. Ils ont trouvé une marque.

  1. Retirer (remove repetition): Ils marchaient. Ils marchaient dans... → one sentence: Amir et Chloé marchaient dans la forêt.
  2. Ajouter (add an adverb and a connector): Amir et Chloé marchaient tranquillement dans la forêt quand, tout à coup, un brouillard épais est tombé.
  3. Remplacer (show, don't tell): Ils avaient peur → Chloé serrait nerveusement ses bâtons. (Serrer = to grip; nerveusement is our adverb.)
  4. Déplacer + ajouter (suspense): keep the discovery for the end and make it short: Ils ont cherché les marques pendant de longues minutes. Rien. Enfin, Amir a vu un éclat orange sur un arbre.
  5. Check verbs: imparfait for background and feelings (marchaient, serrait), passé composé for events (est tombé, ont cherché, a vu).

Amir et Chloé marchaient tranquillement dans la forêt quand, tout à coup, un brouillard épais est tombé. Chloé serrait nerveusement ses bâtons. Ils ont cherché les marques pendant de longues minutes. Rien. Enfin, Amir a vu un éclat orange sur un arbre.

Metacognition for writers

After each draft, answer three questions in your writing notebook:

  1. Qu'est-ce qui marche bien dans mon texte ? (What works well?)
  2. Quelle révision a fait la plus grande différence ? (Which revision helped most?)
  3. Mon objectif pour le prochain texte : one specific goal, e.g. Je vais varier mes connecteurs or Je vais vérifier l'accord de chaque participe passé.

Keep your goals in one place. In Lesson 14 you will look back at them.

Just for fun

Anticonstitutionnellement (unconstitutionally) is often called one of the longest words in French: 25 letters, and it's an adverb! Try putting it between a and dormi. Actually, don't: long -ment adverbs go after the participle.

Hands-on activity

Write your own suspense story

You need: paper or a device, and five sticky notes or small pieces of paper.

  1. Plan: write each stage of the schéma narratif on its own sticky note, in point form. Put them in a mountain shape on a wall or table. Move them around until the order feels right.
  2. Draft: write 12 to 15 sentences in the past (imparfait, passé composé, plus-que-parfait). Don't stop to fix everything; just write.
  3. Revise: use the four moves. Add at least four adverbs (two -ment ones, one between avoir/être and the participle) and five different connectors. Add one very short sentence for suspense.
  4. Read aloud: read your story to someone at home. Mark any sentence where you stumbled; that's a sentence to fix.
  5. Reflect: answer the three metacognition questions above.

Keep this story! You will edit and publish it with the checklist in Lesson 14. Look for: all five stages, correct tenses, adverbs in the right place, and a satisfying ending.

Your turn

1

Name the five stages of the schéma narratif in French.

2

Form the adverb: doux.

3

Form the adverb: vrai.

4

Form the adverb: prudent.

5

Place the adverb: J'ai dormi. (bien)

6

Which connector shows contrast: donc, pourtant, ensuite?

7

In Le sentier, what is the élément déclencheur?

More practice: warm-up

1

Adverb from lent?

2

Adverb from bon?

3

Adverb from poli?

4

What does ensuite mean?

5

What is le brouillon?

More practice: on your own

1

Form the adverb: constant. Then use it in a sentence.

2

Form the adverb: heureux. Then translate Fortunately, the bus arrived.

3

Put the adverb in the right place: Nous avons compris la question. (vite)

4

Join with a connector: Il neigeait. Nous sommes allés au parc. (show contrast)

5

Revise to show, not tell: Malik était surpris.

Challenge

1

Correct the three adverb errors: Elle a marché lentment. Il parle patientement. Ils ont joué très bon.

2

Write a pendant que sentence and explain the two tenses.

3

Explain why a writer should finish a draft before correcting spelling.

Check your understanding

Quiz

1.

In the schéma narratif, the moment the problem starts is called...

2.

The adverb from patient is...

3.

The adverb from sérieux is...

4.

Which sentence places the adverb correctly?

5.

Which connector shows a consequence?

6.

Replacing Il avait peur with Ses mains tremblaient is an example of...

For parents and teachers

Big idea: Your child plans a story for a clear purpose and audience (D1.1, D2.1), drafts it (D1.2), uses adverbs and connectors correctly (D1.3), revises with four moves (D2.2) and sets a personal writing goal (D2.4). The story is kept and finished in Lesson 14.

How to help:

  • Ask to hear the plan before the draft. Can your child tell you the five stages in one sentence each?
  • When your child reads you the draft, tell them one thing you liked and one place you wanted more detail. Specific feedback helps more than It's good!

Common difficulties:

  • Forming -ment adverbs from the masculine (lentment). Use the feminine, unless the masculine ends in a vowel.
  • Spelling -emment (patiemment) because it sounds like -amment.
  • Using bon instead of bien (Il joue bon). Bon describes a noun; bien describes a verb.
  • Fixing spelling during the first draft and losing ideas. Ideas first, corrections later.

Safety note in the model story: the characters' parents know the route, and the story ends with better preparation (a charged phone and a map), which is a good conversation starter about winter outdoor safety.