A. Developing the Skills, Strategies, and Habits Needed to Succeed · Skills, Strategies and Habits for SuccessMy Stress-Management Toolkit: Past, Present and Future
A1.2About 70 minutes
Learning goals- I can identify a range of strategies for managing stress in body, mind, connection and spirit.
- I can choose between dealing with the problem and dealing with the feelings, or use both.
- I can explain how I have used stress-management strategies in the past and what I would change.
- I can plan how to apply these strategies to future situations, such as postsecondary studies and work.
Words to know
coping strategy
Something you do to manage stress or a difficult situation.
problem-focused coping
Dealing with the cause of the stress, for example by making a plan or asking for help.
emotion-focused coping
Dealing with the feelings stress causes, for example by breathing slowly, exercising or talking to someone.
avoidance
Trying not to think about or deal with a stressor. It can feel good for a moment but usually makes things worse.
self-reflection
Taking time to think honestly about your experiences, choices and feelings in order to learn from them.
mentor
A more experienced person who gives you advice and support over time.
One tool is not enough
Imagine trying to build a deck with only a hammer. You could pound nails, but you couldn't measure, cut or drill. Stress is the same. Different stressors need different tools, and the tool that works before a hockey game might be useless the night before an exam.
In this lesson you will build your own stress-management toolkit, look back at strategies you have used before, and plan how you will use them in the future: in Grade 11 and 12, at a job, and after high school.
Remember from Grade 9
In Grade 9 health you practised box breathing (in 4, hold 4, out 4, hold 4), the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding method, changing the thought, and problem-solving by breaking a big stress into small steps. Grade 10 Career Studies asks you to go further: explain how you have used these strategies and how you will apply them to new situations, such as a job or postsecondary studies.
What goes in the toolkit
The Career Studies curriculum lists many strategies. Here they are, grouped:
Body
- Sleep. Canada's 24-Hour Movement Guidelines recommend 8 to 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep a night for teens aged 14 to 17, with regular bed and wake times.
- Fresh air and physical activity. The same guidelines recommend at least 60 minutes of moderate to vigorous physical activity a day. A walk in the snow counts.
- Healthy food choices and water. Skipping meals makes stress and focus worse.
- Breathing exercises. Slow breathing, especially breathing out more slowly than you breathe in, helps calm the stress response.
- Listening to music, stretching, dancing.
Mind
- List priorities and make an action plan.
- Time management, including a digital calendar or planner (next lesson).
- Regular self-reflection, such as journaling.
- Positive self-talk (last lesson).
Connection and spirit
- Talk with a mentor, friend or trusted adult.
- Spiritual, cultural or community activities, such as attending a faith service, joining a cultural group, taking part in ceremonies or community events, volunteering, or spending time on the land.
Deal with the problem, or deal with the feelings?
There are two broad kinds of coping:
- Problem-focused coping goes after the cause: make a plan, break the task into steps, ask for an extension, have a conversation to sort out a conflict.
- Emotion-focused coping manages the feelings: slow breathing, exercise, music, talking to someone, reframing.
Ask: can I change the stressor? If yes, problem-focused coping is usually the most powerful. If you can't change it (a family member is ill, the move is happening), emotion-focused coping and support help you get through it. Very often you need both: calm your body first, then make a plan.
Watch for avoidance. Scrolling for hours, gaming all night, skipping school, using alcohol, cannabis or vapes, or taking stress out on others can feel like relief in the moment, but they leave the stressor in place and usually make things worse.
Worked exampleLet's build Daniel's plan for exam week
Daniel has three exams in five days in January, plus two four-hour shifts at a hardware store. He usually copes by gaming until 1 a.m. Choose strategies for him and explain each choice.
- Can he change the stressors? Partly. He can't move the exams, but he can plan his studying and talk to his manager about shifts. So he needs both kinds of coping.
- Problem-focused: make an exam study schedule with 45-minute blocks for each subject, starting with the first exam. Ask his manager, at least two weeks ahead, whether he can swap one shift.
- Body: set a 10:30 p.m. screens-off time so he gets about 8 to 9 hours of sleep; walk to work instead of getting a ride when the weather allows.
- Emotion-focused: use slow breathing before each exam; listen to music for 15 minutes as a study break.
- Replace avoidance: gaming isn't banned. He limits it to 30 minutes as a reward after a study block, before 9:30 p.m.
- Connection: tell his older cousin, who finished college last year, what he is doing, and ask for one tip.
Daniel's plan mixes problem-focused tools (schedule, talking to his manager), body tools (sleep, walking), emotion-focused tools (breathing, music) and connection (his cousin), and turns his avoidance habit into a limited reward.
Looking back: what have I used before?
The curriculum asks you to explain how you have used strategies in the past. Honest reflection is how you improve your toolkit. For each past stressful situation, ask:
- What was the stressor?
- What did I do?
- Did it help? How do I know?
- What would I change next time?
Looking ahead: future stressors
You will face new stressors soon: Grade 11 and 12 workloads, a first job, applying to college, university or an apprenticeship, perhaps moving away from home, managing your own money and schedule. Many of your current tools will still work. Some will need adapting. A student who learns now to protect sleep during exams, ask for help early and keep in touch with supportive people will carry those tools into every future pathway.
Just for funSea otters sometimes hold paws while they sleep so they don't drift apart from each other. Even otters know that staying connected is one of the best stress strategies around.
Hands-on activityToolkit card and breathing test
You need: an index card or a small piece of paper, a pen, and a clock or phone with a seconds timer.
Part 1: test a tool.
- Sit quietly. Find your pulse on your wrist or the side of your neck and count the beats for 30 seconds. Double it to get beats per minute. Write it down.
- Do slow breathing for 2 minutes: breathe in through your nose for about 4 seconds, then out slowly through your mouth for about 6 seconds.
- Count your pulse for 30 seconds again and double it. Did it change? How do you feel?
(If you feel dizzy, stop and breathe normally.)
Part 2: make your card.
- On one side of the card, write your stress signature (from last lesson).
- On the other side, write two tools for each area: body, mind, connection and spirit. Include at least one problem-focused and one emotion-focused tool.
- Add the name of one person you can talk to, and the Kids Help Phone number (1-800-668-6868, or text CONNECT to 686868).
- Keep the card in your wallet, phone case or backpack.
What to look for: a balanced card (all three areas), tools that are realistic for this person, and a named support person. In the breathing test, many people's pulse drops a little, but it is fine if yours doesn't; how you feel matters too.
Your turn
1How many hours of sleep do Canada's 24-Hour Movement Guidelines recommend for teens aged 14 to 17?
8 to 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep a night.
2Give one strategy for each area: body, mind, connection and spirit.
Examples: body: a walk outside; mind: list priorities and make an action plan; connection and spirit: talk to a trusted adult or take part in a cultural or community activity.
3What is the difference between problem-focused and emotion-focused coping?
Problem-focused coping deals with the cause of the stress (making a plan, asking for help). Emotion-focused coping deals with the feelings (breathing, exercise, talking).
4Your best friend is moving to Alberta. Can you change the stressor? Which type of coping fits best?
No, you can't change the move. Emotion-focused coping fits best (talking about it, staying active, spending time together before the move), plus a small problem-focused step such as planning video calls.
5Why can avoidance make stress worse?
It gives short-term relief, but the stressor is still there and often grows (for example, the assignment gets closer to the deadline), so stress increases later.
6Write the four questions to ask when reflecting on a past strategy.
- What was the stressor? 2. What did I do? 3. Did it help, and how do I know? 4. What would I change next time?
7Name two future situations where you will need stress-management strategies.
Examples: Grade 12 exams, a first full-time job, applying to college, university or an apprenticeship, moving away from home, managing your own money.
More practice: warm-up
1How many minutes of moderate to vigorous physical activity per day do the guidelines recommend for youth?
2Is "asking a teacher for an extension" problem-focused or emotion-focused?
3Is "listening to music to calm down" problem-focused or emotion-focused?
4In slow breathing, should you breathe out faster or slower than you breathe in?
Slower. A longer out-breath helps calm the stress response.
A more experienced person who gives you advice and support over time.
More practice: on your own
1Ella had a fight with her friend and has a big test tomorrow. Suggest one emotion-focused and one problem-focused strategy, and explain the order you would use them in.
First, emotion-focused: a walk or slow breathing to calm down, so she can think clearly. Then problem-focused: send a short message suggesting they talk after the test, and make a 90-minute study plan for tonight. Calming down first makes the problem-solving work better.
2Reflect for this student: "Last June I pulled two all-nighters before exams. I felt awful and blanked on the math exam." What would you change?
The all-nighters cut sleep, which hurts memory and focus, so it likely caused the blanking. Change: start studying a week earlier with a schedule, keep a regular bedtime, and use short breaks with activity.
3Explain how a spiritual, cultural or community activity can help with stress. Give an example.
It can give a sense of belonging, meaning and calm, and connect you with supportive people. Example: singing in a community choir, attending a faith service, joining a cultural dance group or taking part in a community feast.
4A student says, "Breathing exercises don't work for me." Is that a problem? What should they do?
No. Different tools work for different people. They should try other tools in the same area (a walk, stretching, music) and keep the ones that help. A toolkit should be personal.
5How might your stress toolkit need to change when you start your first full-time job or postsecondary program?
You may have less structure (no bells or teachers checking in), new stressors (rent, commuting, living away from home), and new support people. You may need stronger time management, new ways to stay active, and new contacts (a college counselling service, an employee assistance program, new friends or mentors).
Challenge
1Evaluate this plan: "When I'm stressed, I'll just go to the gym." Give one strength and two weaknesses, and improve it.
Strength: physical activity really does help with stress. Weaknesses: it only uses one area (body), and it does nothing about stressors that need a plan (an assignment, a conflict); the gym may also not always be available. Improved: "When I'm stressed, I'll exercise to calm down, then list my priorities and make a plan, and if it lasts more than a few days, I'll talk to someone."
2The curriculum suggests First Nations, Métis and Inuit communities have their own approaches to harmony and balance. Why is it important not to assume one approach applies to all Indigenous people?
First Nations, Métis and Inuit are distinct peoples, and there are many different First Nations, each with its own languages, teachings and practices. Assuming one approach fits all is a stereotype. The respectful way to learn is from the specific community, through its Elders, Métis Senators, knowledge keepers or knowledge holders.
3Design a stress plan for a student in their first month of college, living away from home for the first time. Include at least one tool from each area and one problem-focused step.
Sample: Body: regular bedtime, walking to campus, cooking simple meals. Mind: a weekly schedule with every deadline in a digital calendar; journaling on Sundays. Connection and spirit: a weekly call home, joining one club, finding the campus counselling service and Indigenous or cultural student centre if relevant. Problem-focused: visit each professor's office hours once in the first month to ask how best to prepare.
Quiz
1. How much sleep do Canada's 24-Hour Movement Guidelines recommend for teens aged 14 to 17?
2. Which is a problem-focused coping strategy?
3. When is emotion-focused coping especially useful?
4. Which is an example of avoidance?
5. Which is a connection and spirit strategy?
6. Why reflect on strategies you used in the past?
Big idea: Expectation A1.2 asks students to identify stress-management strategies and to explain how they have used them and how they might apply them in the future, including in postsecondary education and work. The curriculum's examples include sleep, fresh air, physical activity, healthy food, music, breathing exercises, spiritual, cultural or community activities, listing priorities, time management, self-reflection and talking with a mentor, friend or trusted adult.
How to help: Ask what is on their toolkit card. Share a tool that works for you and one that didn't. Support sleep during exam weeks (screens out of the bedroom at night is a common family agreement). If your family has cultural, spiritual or community practices that help with stress, talk about them.
Common difficulties:
- Toolkits that are all one area (often only "body" or only "distraction").
- Treating avoidance as coping. Help them notice the difference between a break and avoiding.
- Unrealistic tools. A tool they will actually use beats a perfect one they won't.
The breathing activity is safe for most people; anyone who feels dizzy should stop and breathe normally.